Hose Down Your Hoo-Ha

A man was at work going through his checkbook and noticed that his wife had written a check to Mark & M.E. He didn’t realize that she had come to see me. He called her as soon as he discovered the entry and told her that seeing a check written to our salon made him very excited and he couldn’t wait to see her.

Fantastic article – I was in not too long ago and you were talking about this article. I am glad I was able to find and read it.

**Christine**

Summer is here. Is your snatch sexy or scary?

I like to keep the conversation going during a wax because it’s a good distraction for the client. I asked a woman who she lived with and as I was pulling a strip off she yelled “Jesus!”

I can count on one hand how many women I have thoroughly trained to wax like I do, and only a couple of them can actually do it like me. So if someone tells you she was trained by me, chances are she is full of shit.

Women get so nervous that I am going to judge what I see when they undress. A woman couldn’t decide if she should make up a story or tell me the truth about her body. She took off her pants, covered her parts with her hands, and hesitated getting on the table while she decided what to tell me. The problem was that she was bruised on her upper thighs and didn’t want me to think she was being abused by her husband. She was actually embarrassed because she tried waxing herself and her skin was pretty beat up. Sometimes saving money just isn’t worth it.

I like when the waxing service accompanies another monumental experience. It’s flattering to be a part of something memorable. Like when 2 girls come in together for Brazilians then go get their hoods pierced.

Life is a continuous learning experience. And it is amazing what I learn from my clients. Did you know you can buy rubber sheets? They are used for Golden Showers. Yep, that’s right. Golden Showers. I guess they are easier to clean when someone pees all over you during sex.

I’ve had several women over the years bite on their socks or towels when they are getting waxed. The other day, I had another first. A girl said that she forgot her teddy bear to hang onto so she rolled up her jeans and hung onto them for dear life. I have to admit that it looked kind of funny seeing a girl hugging her jeans. But, whatever works.

A husband kept teasing his wife about how long her hair was getting. He’d rub the area and say that he was patting the rug. After I finished, I told her he couldn’t pat the rug anymore. He’d have to pat the linoleum.