Hose Down Your Hoo-Ha

Got your period? No biggie. Shower. Fresh tampon. It’s all good. I told that to a woman, but she said she didn’t want the two of us to meet. That’s OK too.

About 10 years ago, my son made a sign to put on the door of my Facial Room at the Salon that said Relaxtion Suite. Although I only do waxing in that room now, I have never wanted to remove the sign. A woman walked into the room recently and commented that she was entering the Pain Chamber. It ccurred to me that things have really changed over the years.

I commented to a girl that she had really hairy lips. She said she’d rather have hairy lips down below. Agreed.

A husband kept putting off renewing his life insurance. So his wife kept putting off getting a wax. She gave him an ultimatum. She wasn’t getting waxed until he renewed the policy. Everyone is happy in that household today.

When a woman has thick, dark hair, it can look pretty creepy when I rip off a large amount at one time. The other day I pulled a huge strip off of a lady and she said, “oh look, I had a mouse living down there.”

I have a client that lives fairly far from the salon that comes in every 6 weeks for her braces on her teeth to be adjusted. She said that the timing is perfect. Every 6 weeks she comes to Rochester for her braces and her beave.

I heard about a salon that puts a dollop of essential oils on your rectal hole before waxing that area. I’m not sure if it’s kinky, a little odd or just plain unnecessary. Wax doesn’t stick to oil, but hair does grow right up to the promised land. When I asked my client how she felt about having oil put on her rectum, she said that it was really weird and she went home with a hairy ass hole!

Every time we would rip off a strip, a girl would do a sit up. It was an interesting reaction to the whole waxing process. But isn’t it cool that you can get a free work out while you are getting waxed?

A girl told me that she went to another salon in town and the technician took 2 hours to give her a Brazilian. I told her that I didn’t realize that the salon even did Brazilians. She said that they obviously didn’t by the stupid amount of time it took to do it. I then asked her if she got a happy ending because I cannot fathom what could ever take so long. She told me that she wasn’t able to get a happy ending for a very long time.

I have clean up stations in every wax room to ensure you get all of the stickiness off of your body. If after you leave the salon, you find yourself peeing all over the place, you did a lousy job of cleaning up.