Hose Down Your Hoo-Ha

Often women will make their appointments early in the morning so they can get it over with. A girl, who had driven an hour to see me, walked in the door and told me she had driven a long way to see me and it felt like the drive of death. Ladies, it’s not that bad!

I got an email from a girl who said that if she had to wait one more week, she’d need a zoo keeper. Interesting visual.

I asked a woman to roll on her right so I could wax her backside when she stopped, pointed a finger at me and said “now listen, I don’t have a perfect asshole.” Trust me, no one does.

The other day, I told you about an older woman who’s husband wanted to watch and she told him to kiss it good bye.[and he did] I just remembered that she told me he couldn’t wait for her to come home so he could try it out. She told him he’d have to wait, because she wanted to try it out and get used to it first.

Tooting while I’m ripping is annoying.

Once you’ve seen one, it’s really no big deal.

Someone told me they heard something funny on TV. A girl said she needed to turn her peach into a nectarine. I always preferred nectarines.

A first time Brazilian client told me she has been married 42 years and her husband wanted to come to the appointment with her to watch. She told him that he was not allowed to come but he could kiss it good bye. So he did.

A mature woman gets off the table, walks over to the full length mirror to examine her new bald look and says, “oh, you’re 12 again!”

For some people, a Brazilian can be very painful. It isn’t uncommon for women to swear, scream and make all sorts of guttural sounds during the service. So I had to laugh when a woman asked me if it would be OK if she yelled. I gave her my permission and my blessing.