Hose Down Your Hoo-Ha

On our website, we have a helpful wax hint page that was designed to make your experience a little better and teach people about Brazilian etiquette. A girl lifted her leg and her man’s baby butter oozed out of her like a faucet. I don’t think she read the page.

A girl yelled WTF during her wax. I had to assure her that saying the actual word during a Brazilian was very common.

I was really hurt by a negative review on Yelp that I saw yesterday. I am saddened that someone found my ten pound, hypo-allergenic dog that doesn’t bark or jump on people offensive. I also have dog allergies and wouldn’t have Bandit in the salon if he could aggravate people’s allergies. If I ever comment on your flexibility, please accept it as the biggest compliment. Many women have limited flexibility and it is nearly impossible to find their lady parts so I truly appreciate someone who can stretch. Sometimes bruising does occur, but it can happen for a variety of reasons unrelated to my technique. If I caused it, then I am very sorry. And, finally, there are times when the hair is too short to all come out. Maybe you haven’t waited long enough, the last place who waxed you didn’t get the hairs from the roots, or the friction from intercourse broke some of your hairs. I won’t apologize for not spending an hour tweezing you. I may seem easy going and even cavalier about doing your Brazilian, but that it to make you as comfortable as possible, because I know it can be an uncomfortable experience. I have worked very hard to be the best in this industry and I have so many dedicated clients that I needed to share this with you.

My friend who brings Jose Cuervo to her Brazilian appointment didn’t have enough in the bottle for us to do a decent shot before her wax. She tried to back out. Fortunately, I learned a lot from my dad, who was a really good insurance salesman, and was able to sell her the whole policy.

It appears that the demand for rectal bleaching has increased. I had two more people ask if I could do it for them or if I knew where they could get it done. It wouldn’t be wise for me to put bleach on an area that was freshly waxed. My primary concern when I go between a woman’s legs is removing all of the pubic and rectal hair, regardless of the color.
~not your Brazilian Bleacher~

Vagina’s are like snowflakes. No two are identical.
~your observant Brazilian Wax Tech~

I don’t wait.
~your efficient Brazilian Wax Tech~

Just Do It. Not just for Nike.
~Feel the power of a Brazilian~

I asked a girl how things were going with her man. She told me she just bought a new toy she liked better then him. I told her she needed a new man.
~Brazilians make playing with your toys better too~

My air conditioned crotch girl acted surprised that a trucker honked at her. I doubt he was offended that she hadn’t gotten her Brazilian yet.