Hose Down Your Hoo-Ha

I have been asked to be the entertainment at a bridal shower. Since Mark & I have been married nearly 27 years, I do Brazilians for a living, I wrote a funny book, and I have stories galore that I love to tell and share, the bride asked me to do a question & answer/storytelling gig at her party. Could be a new career.

I dare you to tell a random person about your Happy Hoo-Ha and report back to me how they respond.
~spreading the Brazilian word~

I’m going to touch you where you pee and where you poop. Get over it.
~your thorough waxing specialist~

How different my life would be if I still taught first grade. For starters, seven years old girls naturally have Brazilians.

A 39 week pregnant woman, who was expecting her second child, came in for a wax. Soon after we started her Brazilian, she felt a lot of wetness between her legs. It appears she passed her mucus plug upon getting on the table. I suppose most technicians would have been grossed out by all of the gunk that was coming out of her, but I have to admit that I was pretty excited. So we took a break from the wax, I gave her some wipes, she cleaned up the area, and we finished her wax. I was kind of disappointed that her water didn’t break, because that would have been really exciting, but knowing that she was one step closer to having this baby was pretty cool as well.

When I researched the negative side effects of our Benjamin Buddies, the first thing I saw was that “your vagina gets so muscular that it chokes cocks to death.” I think that could come in handy.
~Brazilian research continues…~

Now I’m thinking I may have to get me some of those Ben Wa Bad Boys.
~expanding my Brazilian Horizon~

So what happens when you’re walking through Wegmans and your Ben Wa Balls start to fall out? Do you nonchalantly try to shove them back in or just pray they don’t fall out off your panties onto the floor?
~Brazilian Dilemma~

I did not realize that some of my clients wear Ben Wa balls in their vagina all day long to strengthen the muscles between their legs. A woman was worried about keeping the balls in her vagina during her Brazilian, because she was afraid they would shoot out and break one of my windows when she flinched.

A young hoo-ha may look prettier, but an older hoo-ha has the power.