Mark & M.E. had 2 babies 2 years in a row on Labor Day weekend. Although we feel blessed with the birth of all our children, I’m feeling a little phantom pain in the puss this morning.
Hose Down Your Hoo-Ha
Thoughts, stories, and insights from M.E. Nesser
Remember when I told you about the black woman who wanted her bikini area bleached so it was all one color and looked like a glazed donut? I forgot to tell you that part of the reason she wanted this done was because she saw that area on Rhianna and Rhianna’s was the perfect color. I’m not sure how she saw Rhianna’s bikini area so closely; I didn’t ask. I did tell her that anyone that wealthy could have any body part manufactured to look any way she wanted.
A woman entered the wax room and told me she heard some upsetting news about me. I got nervous even though I had no idea what she was referring too. She said she heard a rumor that I was retiring. She reminded me that I was the only one who saw her vagina, except for her fiancé of course. She was freaking out, because she didn’t think she could handle anyone else waxing her. I assured her that I wasn’t ready to retire quite yet. There are still thousands of vaginas that need my love.
I had another first happen that I had to share. I’ve had women ask me if Mark & M.E. offers rectal bleaching, and I have to admit that is one service I have no interest in performing. The other day, a young woman asked me if I did vaginal bleaching. She didn’t like that her skin wasn’t one consecutive color in her bikini area. I needed to remind her that she was a black woman and bleaching the skin would probably make it look even worse. She said she googled vaginal bleaching and they only showed pictures of white women’s vaginas. Surprise? So she googled African American vaginal bleaching and came up with no results. She told me she wanted the area to look like a glazed donut with no chocolate filling. At this point, I was laughing so hard, I could barely do my job.
A girl walked into the waxing room and said she was terrified like it was her first time. I told her that it’d be easier since she used the numbing cream. She couldn’t figure out how I knew she used the cream. I told her I could smell it. She was embarrassed that I could smell it through her clothing. I told her I was a hoo-ha hound dog.
I’ve started a new blog that has to do with the theme in my romance novels. (It’s about sex.) It can be found at apromiseofpassion.com There is room for the readers to comment and add stories. I’m hoping it’ll be entertaining and engaging. I’ve started out somewhat mildly, but you know that won’t continue. It is one of my absolute favorite topics. I’ve made the site mobile friendly, so check it out and let me know what you think!
I had two women getting waxed in the same room yesterday. I told them the story about the woman who advised me that black women don’t have hair between their cheeks. It’s one of my funniest stories to date. They were laughing so hard, the one started to cry. That’s what getting a Brazilian wax should be all about…fun!
In 1991 and 1992, I had a baby on Labor Day weekend. Yes, 2 babies back to back. It was a busy time for Mark & M.E. I remember making sure I had freshly decorated nails and piggies, my body was hair-free, and my hair was freshly colored or permed. It was a scary and exciting time in our lives.
For many of you, it’s also a time to celebrate, because your kids are going back to school. That was a definite bonus once our children were school age too. I know it’s sad to see summer coming to an end, but we had such an amazing summer, we can’t complain. I’ve never felt so much Vitamin D radiating through our fine city ever. More than just our hoo-ha’s have been happy these past three months.
No matter what your motivation is this coming weekend, make sure your parts are properly groomed so you can celebrate in style! See you this week…
Don’t wait until the last minute to groom your hedges for the upcoming weekend’s festivities. Mark & I will not be working Saturday. We will be working longer hours this week to accommodate all your hair and hair removal needs, so let’s us know what works. The salon will be open from 8-3 on Saturday, however, for those of you who can only make it on that day, and our staff will take excellent care of you!a
Have you downloaded the sequel yet? Can’t wait to hear what you think of the limo scene… #passionneverdies
