Hose Down Your Hoo-Ha

I feel inclined to follow up on yesterday’s blog. Blunts aren’t recommended before a wax. They can make you paranoid and less resistant. If you’d like to celebrate with one after your Brazilian, however, be my guest.

I waxed a girl yesterday who is moving to Colorado.  She is nervous about getting a wax from someone else.  I told her that it’ll be fine as long as they give her a blunt before her Brazilian.

I waxed a lot of people yesterday. No one bruised, bled, kicked me, peed on me, grabbed me or fell off the table. It was like a perfect day at the beach.

If you’re a toe curler when you’re in pain, you may want to keep your shoes on to prevent cramping during your wax.

The more flexible you are, the easier it is for me to access the Brazilian area. If I comment on your flexibility, it is a sincere compliment, because you are doing me a tremendous favor and making my job easier. You should never think that I am insinuating you are a stripper or a porn star because I admire how well you are able to stretch. And if you find my compliment an insult, I apologize, but I do have to wonder if a part of you has a guilty conscious.

Now that our son is officially gone, I won’t have time to wallow in the sea of empty nest-dom. I’ll be too busy burying myself in the nests of the men and women who graciously patron Mark & ME.

Prepare to get sticky from the sap. Thirty years ago I was a student at the University of Rochester, met Mark, and started working at the salon as a part-time receptionist. Today, I am still with Mark and still at the salon, but in a much different capacity. What is most unbelievable is that I am moving my youngest child into college this morning. It seems like an appropriate day for gratitude and reflection. It has been an exciting and emotional journey that ain’t over yet baby!

I think doing Brazilians has made me funnier.

I am still getting criticized for not leaving the room while you undress. Not only am I going to see your lady parts up close and personal, I am going to be touching them. So removing your panties while I prep the table should not be awkward. In my opinion, entering the room while you’re naked from the waist down waiting for me seems like it would feel more strange. I’m completely unaffected by you being naked. I just want to make you bald. But if that part of the process makes you feel uncomfortable, then I am sorry. My goal has always been to make you feel as comfortable as possible.